Book Review: Love and Misadventure by Lang Leav

Will create a detailed blog reply elaborating on the poems I shared in one the comments below this one.

The Book Hooligan

I’m not really an avid reader of poetry and my expertise in the genre is minimal at best. However, I do appreciate well-written poems that I read every now and then. I remember that the first poem that I really liked, that had a profound effect on me, was Allen Ginsberg’s Howl which I read during an American Contemporary Literature class.  Since then, for brief spurts of time, I read poetry whenever the inspiration to do so strikes. In this regard, I think I now have a handle on appreciating poetry.

Enter Lang Leav’s Love and Misadventures. Admittedly, I was intrigued by its hype and, therefore, decided to read it since it was short and also because I was curious as to why a lot of people were raving about it. Surely, a lot of people can’t be wrong all at the same time and that Leav’s poetry would merit…

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On the little prince: incomplete

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This has been a wonderful journey; somewhere someone too will take flight. They only have to wait for that chance to leap and take hold of the rope that pulls them towards the next star. Sometimes, that rope entangles them, leaving no trace, of why, they’ve gone. Sometimes they willfully pull themselves away, hurriedly wanting to see different places, know about other people, what they do, why they do it, perhaps for their own selfish reasons, or perhaps because it ties them to their purpose. Whatever purpose that may be we only have to see it for what it truly is.

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Abandon ship: Leaving arnis – On priorities, spiritual foundations, and family

Abandon ship: Leaving Arnis

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On changing priorities, building on spiritual foundations, a question on what i build my life on, and the importance of family.

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Quitting arnis…but it doesn’t mean i’ll stop watching events or research on its history in my free time 😀 – it’s a poignant memory, like that of a childhood home constantly deluged by the flood of circumstances. However hard you try to come back to it, the currents pull you away. It’s like that for me for the past six years, a constant tug of war between time, money and accessibility/distance. They say, a friend’s home isn’t ever far away…the question is, for how long? Now that I’m 25, priorities change and people must change or they’ll be extinct like the dinosaurs, I…I’ll come back soon, I hope. – Leaving arnis is like leaving a family. It’s not easy. Somewhere in Shakespeare, I read “Now i must look at the eye of the tempest.” Well, come what may.

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Now that i’m 25 i’m living on burrowed time, i have five years to strike a stable career or management position. So, yes, I’m not asking for a solution, I know what i said, napagisipan ko ito (I have already thought of it well enough – the pros and cons), it’s not very easy to make this decision. this time just lend me an ear, but that’s it, i know what i’m doing, so trust me on this. brothers. (To my brothers in arms Virgil Aldrin OrtegaPatrick GamayoPatrick Lubaton thank you for understanding. Kita pa rin sa mga events)

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it is also a public declaration that i will stop. I know what i am talking about.it’s a factor that TIME MANAGEMENT ALONE CANNOT ANSWER. There’s the distance of 14 kilometers from my home to the National park where I train. Since it’s Sunday, I also have to go to church, that is 6 kilometers from home, add that with 14 kilometers, that’s 20 KM. And a family dinner to go afterwards. Think about what i’ve been doing for three years. There really is a lot going on.

Maybe, this is just something I want to prove a point to those of my friends, out of their good will of course, to help. Well, it isn’t just time management. especially since you also want to take that one day off from your work week to train, have time for your family, and nurture your spiritual path. Yeah, maybe some people frown on this last part. Well, this was never an easy decision to begin with. It was never easy not to have anything to rely on when you’ve failed at work or in a sense been demotivated.

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i bet no one hired the same architect who designed it – build on stronger foundations

Somewhat, even if martial arts had been my identity, i reaserch about it, i watch videos on it on top of an entry level career path i’m on, somehow even if there is progress, it doesn’t make much sense. Somehow, it all crumbles down to rubble. Says in Ecclesiastes in the bible by Solomon, that everything is meaningless from someone who had just had the rest of the world’s riches, had wisdom and just some 700 wives and 300 concubines. Somewhere along those verses, he said that what is truly important is to have faith in God, paraphrased, good relatiosn with people? Is that it. Well, since I just 25 this year, a lot has changed. I suddenly ask questions that concern family life that I want to build upon. Waht would my son think if i reacted towards a problem? What would my wife think if I was still addicted in some things…that in a sense might hamper or affect My children, or would it cause years of grief with my wife? What would I do if my son would ask or tell me that he wanted to be a doctor or some other high tuitioned college program? Would I be able to give him strength? encouragement? hope? drive to success? or would i instead wallow in regret? failed opportunities? what i could have beens?

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Somehow, now, i truly felt, not understood, felt Robert Frost’s poem on “diverging paths”. Truth is, once I have a family, it’s my family that I rely on and they in me. What would float my boat? Well, some choose what works for them, i choose mine. Somehow, to make a sturdy boat, i need quality nails, to keep the wood from falling apart. Now, i’m just raft, soon I’ll be carrying weight more than my own. So i’ll need a bigger ship for a bigger current and stronger waves. I can’t just move along the waves like I usually do, I have to have a rudder and a sail. I have to have somewhere to go to, if not how would my family go anywhere? Well, i have to start with knowing my faith, facing my doubts and other people’s. I know many people have given up with the idea of God in their lives, but I just can’t remove the concept of having a God who would serve you, who would wash your feet, who would carry you since you cannot carry yourself.

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under the context of having disciples talk about who was the greatest, jesus displayed how leaders should be, serving not ordering. – washing feet was the dirtiest jobs in thoses times that even the jewish slaves would not do, only those who considered gentiles were to do it. – it was a custom for the host to have his guests’ feet washed as a sign of hospitality.

I want to have what my mother had during that short quake in Pizza hut, when i noticed how the water moved in the glass and how i felt dizzy, when she stood up, held our hands and prayed in thankfulness and protection. There were many instances that my family members changed. How I could feel that inner joy. I wanted to have that. When things don’t seem to go your way, how will you get up weaker but stronger.

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How would I give my family hope when there is none? purpose when everything feels so meaningless? i never got those questions when i turned 24 last year, only just this year, January 2013 weird concerns bugged me. I need to dig deeper, why do I follow my faith? How can I grow in my faith in Christ?

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You train in Arnis, but since time and work and distance pulls you away from it, what happens to whatever it is that you’ve been investing on? You learn but somehow you also forget. You can’t seem to get enough of just one or two trainings a month. And, somehow, you feel that the time you spent in training seems to push you away from your family. I seem to have lost several months of bonding time. I’m not sure how some people treat family here. Maybe some of them would only shrug and say, they’ll always be there or they’ll always be here even if you grow old. Well, that’s the thing, i can’t just treat them like wallpaper. Family time is important to my family. We have dinner every saturday night, together since both my parents are busy throughout the week, my siblings are busy with school, organizations, i with work and martial arts. I have to have a good relationship with my dad, with my mom, with my sister or brother. Now that we’re in our 20’s I had once thought that we already were close enough, but we weren’t. Many instances and problems came and we had to hold on to each other, to reach out for each other, to keep our hopes up for a falling sibling, how do we reach out with someone, how do we build time to understand, to show love, to show patience and sacrifice? To encourage. I don’t get that outside, we rarely talk about it with my friends. Although they know what i’m facing, at the end of the day, it’s still my parents who would pay for my hospital bills or rent or extra money when i go broke. When I get my own family, I don;t think I would have as much time with my parents as I had before. Although, He, my father, does want to have one family dinner every week. The chinese respect their parents, that’s a good trait, my father learned from henry sy, owner of the biggest chain malls in the Philippines, the richest taipan in our native shores, how they each spend family time once a week, his sons and daughter with their family. Family is important, family is tight. It should be. It’s where we stay when we don;t know where to go. at least to me. Honor your father and mother.

People stand in what they believe in, it maybe spirituality or their own selves. Their successes or connections, I have to stand with what i want to believe in. I have to be grounded at it.  I’m not saying i’m perfect, i’m imperfect, we all are. And that’s why I need a God, a personal God.

Ending my post, this is setting my priorities straight. That there will always be bigger and more important things than arnis, or even karate, which I now focus my training efforts on. This is an important part of my identity, it is where most of my friends are, it’s either from people who do martial arts or who’s into literature or into the spiritual path I now am in. For anyone to rely on me, i first have to stand up for something, or else I’ll fall for anything.

I put down my sword, and rise up with the sword of the spirit for today I’ll battle not with flesh and blood but against the powers and authorities of these broken world.

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34 months in Hiatus: Word Play #1

Several words from Hiatus:

It has been long since I’ve touched on the topic of poetry as a poet. And I am in a sense getting back on my route by handling the same materials that moved me, similar to what K did in remembering who he in MIB. This would come out as word play, but in a sense i’m trying to feel my way back to that poetry dip. Well, here it is:

Word Play #1

,

Comma intended

like reading poetry

and seeing

pauses in the line

breaks, and clinch

in every joke,

the drama it ensues

in pauses

 

So there we have it. Word Play #1. These are not poems, but from these words some can be poems. My hopefully poem or part of a poem. 34 months in hiatus. 

 

Time to polish my bad poetry. 😛 😀

Silence in Oriphino Jazz Pub

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So, it’s not a Jazz Pub, but it often was full of 9-15 musicians all in one room, sharing the twinkle of liquor, the smell of smokes and japanese food. It just so happened that they were about to move that week.

I met my Japanese Neighbor, Mr. Sacho years before when I slipped a letter through under their door. I could not bring myself, a stranger, to ask to come in and listen to them play Jazz. But I had spent more afternoons outside listening to them play. I could not say what songs they were playing, but I was sure it was Jazz. What with all the trumpets and the trombones, the electric bass guitar, the pianist who had by coincidence had the same surname as mine, the Growling Drummer who reminded me of Louis Armstrong, the singing ladies who were Mr. Sacho’s Secretaries, the percussions which looked like bowling pins with rough edges, and the Japanese Man’s favorite instrument, the Saxophone.

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There were three of which he had, and one which he owned for his entire life. He both had the Soprano, the Alto and the Tenor, but it was the biggest that he had loved the most. Getting back to the Sax Man, he had been delighted to have a neighbor who enjoyed his type of music. Once, he even invited me to learn to play his saxophone, the biggest which I would always get a sore thumb from. After jamming with his entire group, he would all ask them to eat from his table. Everyone would get a bottle or two of beer and a sip of liquor from Mr. Sacho. So, it’s not a Jazz Pub, but it often was full of    9-15 musicians all in one room, sharing the twinkle of liquor, the smell of smokes and japanese food. It just so happened that they were about to move that week. If he had the whim to do so, he would try to teach me the basics of the saxophone, or ask me to play with the band if one the key players were gone. Sometimes he would even want me to bring several pieces, usually the saxophone, home with me. I was just across the street, and he’d want it so much that I learn his intrument which I could practice all afternoon when I get back from school. I declined politely since I was not musically inclined like my siblings and could not the difference between the subtle changes in sound. I COULD, however FEEL the way the musician’s play their music.

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In their own words, a musician had to be horny and imagine as if they were making love with their instrument. I could go on with the details but I choose not too. *laughs* There were a lot of rowdy jokes and boisterous laughter, i’m not sure which ones the other neighbors complain from, the Jazz or the laughter. I would roar, if I could, like the drummer especially when they sing ..mmm.. Louis Armstrong with the Umph! I can only sigh in memory how it was. I remember my siblings who were more musically inclined to note the subtle, which to me was, errors in their playing. But, it didn’t matter much. It is a different experience all together to watch the musicians’ reactions as they play with the Umph!, how it felt like when the lead trumpet would “riff” and how the bass player would …mmm…. *laughs I especially loved the trombone solo with the Pink Panther song. I can feel the chills in my spine and would love to hear from them again.

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But, it is sad, that it was only when they were about to move that I was able to get a camera with the three big capital letters. *laughs* I was not able to get hold of pictures from which I could always look at from a photo album, but I had carried often the memory of those moments where I could literally feel the bump in my heart wish that I could play with them, and I did, even if it was only the bowling pin-like percussion. I loved how, I could not, remove, that smile, when, I, had, played, with them (Comma for Intended Drama). Think of Po the Fat Panda in Kung Fu Panda when he had that smile when he was in the middle of his idols. And we could hear him say in sloooow motion “I looove yooou Guuuys”. Well, I too had the same feeling even if it was that one moment. I felt like a child in their company. Like the sense of child-likeness or child-minded. I’m sorry, haha, i think music is just one of those cases, well several if you do know me, that I do. hahaha. Or maybe just genuine enthusiasm. 😀

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The percussion box – D300

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Banjo – D300

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The Percussion Box II – D300

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Oriphino Dining Table – D300

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Liquor Bar – D300

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Kanji Text – D300

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Piano and Drum Set – D300

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Before Moving – D300

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Side Note – D300

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Moving Out II – D300

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Silence in Oriphino – D300

By Sukoshiyama

Dated 19 April 2013

In Response: To Maggie Mae

First, I want to thank Maggie Mae, a poet who I am currently following. I hope that you could find this discussion interesting, she really does write provocative poetry that will sure ignite your lost sense of curiosity and wonderment.

http://maggiemaeijustsaythis.wordpress.com/

My Reply:

Wait, before anything else, i’ve got to say wow, nice layout! (it’s been three years since i’ve written poetry and what my lit prof kept telling me was that i should find a better word than nice for expression, but i still couldn’t find a word. hahaha)

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Just as a writer of filipino fiction and essays, Butch Dalisay once said it, a writer’s block is a state of fermentation that an idea is not yet ripe for it be used, perhaps we are still lacking in experience, wisdom, and enough vocabulary to cover every word. :D (yeah, i dig this blog, i can totally feel your experience brewing with well grounded black coffee).

yep, a poet is only as good as his last one. hahaha, my last one mind you was ‘Profundity’…was it? See? I don’t even remember what date i wrote it! hahaha :D

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Yeah, after I lessened my time training in Karate and Arnis, most of my free time went to that i guess. I found out that I missed having a good conversation about books, a pinch of philosophy, a batter of spiritual foundations (or any spiritual values you follow which keeps you sane in a cut throat work place :D :D :D ), anime, manga, anything that could be discussed about. I missed that part there. Although I’m sure that the physical aspect would have slower progress, i find that it is more balanced, think of it as having fullness, as opposed to focusing on a few things which I would just do, i think I like to keep my whimsy once a week after 5-6 days of schedules. if you know what i mean sister. :D :D:D

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hmm…it’s actually conversing with people, about books, or just pretty much writing about anything, aaaaand the whimsy. I am more of a rainbow than a laser. :D :D :D
And i want to thank the poems that i liked in your collection that inspired me, wait, that is an inappropriate word for the experience…the poems in your collection reignited, yes that’s THE word, REIGNITED. :D Thank you for being one of those people. :D :D :D

let’s all not get too much preoccupied with our work to forget what scientists and children both have, curiosity and the sense of wonderment.

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Wow, i can almost have this posted as a response blog and have it linked to your site. I do hope that it reignites more followers, eh?

-Sukoshiyama

P.S.
Seriously, thanks Maggie Mae.

Now that you’ve read it, well,  i might analyse her poem for the sake of doing it since I do SO MUCH ENJOY reading her work.  “The Only Hands I Want To Know”  Please check her poetry out.

– Sukoshiyama

Mmm…Finally, i found how i can categorize my poetry analyses for the fun of it, entitled “As the Mountain Moves…” Followed by the following words as needed:

  • Poetry: Title
  • In Response: To Name – a long response with interesting (at least to me 😀 ) ideas I might like to expound or elaborate on.
  • Poetry Analyses: Author’s Name, Apostrophe “S” & Title of Work.

– Sukoshiyama